Topic Edit: 아래 독신남은 잘 읽어보시요, 아니 커플방으로 갈 글인가?

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Now Editing “아래 독신남은 잘 읽어보시요, 아니 커플방으로 갈 글인가?”

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https://www.yahoo.com/parenting/what-one-dad-got-right-and-wrong-when-he-got-120710173837.html

여기 달린 댓글들을...

대부분 댓글들을 단게  다 남자들이네 어찌된건지...근데 읽어보니 이해가 가.

싱글이 행복한건가봐.

M E
     •  12 hours ago  •  12 hours ago

Now keep in mind that Florida has removed the word "father" from the definition of the word "family" in its law dictionary.
    Several other states followed, doing the same.
    This created "primary custody" and "non-primary custody".
    " ;Primary custody" is the winner that takes it all.

Can you guess how it is determined which parent gets "primary custody"?

You guessed it, the state law definition of the word "family" is used as a template too achieve "the best interests of the child".

Now, who can argue that "family" isn't in the best interest of the child?

That is exactly the reason the states made this play on words.

No one can argue with it - until you see the definition of the word "family" no longer includes the word "father".

Who here has seen their state law dictionary and studied it?

Exactly, no one.

Its to difficult to contest this because you first have to prove too people that the definitions of words we all grew up with and honor right now are not the same definitions used in courts.

Good luck with that.
    People are naive and refuse to research the things a messenger tells.
    People assume everyone else they don't know personally is a moron.

Sadly, most people have no idea this has been done.
    No one voted for this.
    No one asked Jeb Bush to do this in Florida.
    No one asked other states to follow.
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            Martin
             •  12 hours ago

I had a female Family Court judge refer to me as a "care giver" instead of the father. Disgusting...
            9 1
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            M E
             •  4 hours ago

@Martin - Thank you for voicing your experience.
            I know how that goes.

Dan
 •  1 hour ago  •  1 hour ago

Having been through a very, very brutal divorce I was taking the higher road as well. My ex and her mommy were not. Every time the kids would go see her she grilled them to death. She had a 88 page report from April until November to give to the court of everywhere we went, ate etc. Her mother even made comments, very nasty comments about me camping, going out of town etc with my two sons and daughter. Lets say that it was the lowest of low you could say about a man. (Trying to get full custody) I even left the church we attended because I have very good hearing and got tired of the comments and trash talk that my ex made many people believe. (You find out who your true friends are quickly) She actually was the one that found love some where else. This was over 10 years ago and she still tries to manipulate them. My sons are very close with me. They moved in with me at 13 years old until they graduated. I haven't heard from my daughter that was polluted by her mother and grandma going on four years now. My daughter was even convinced to legally change her last name to her mothers when she turned 18 (How sick is that) I hope someday she will wake up from the brain washing. I can only pray. I am glad to hear some folks can be amicable in this situation and I applaud you for doing so for the kids. I wish more folks could be that way.

Daryl Pearce
 •  2 hours ago  •  2 hours ago

My divorce was a little stranger then that. I was married for 31 yes 31 years. To a person I really loved and thought I knew inside and out. But I was wrong. The reason's she divorce me was #1- I treated her too good, #2- I put her on a pedestal, and #3-I treated her like a queen. Only to find out she was playing a video game for a while on was talking to a person that lives back east. I have 2 boys 20/25. My ex now lives with this person back east. The 20 year old talks to his mom, while the 25 year old will not. She really wanted her and I to remain best friends after the divorce. But after being blind sided the way I was and devoting 31 years of my life with this woman, the best friends thing is not happening. And I informed her that I never want to see or have any communications with ever again.

Brian C
 •  16 hours ago  •  16 hours ago

As a divorced Dad I felt the same way...never talk about the ex-spouse in a negative way. Unfortunately she didn't feel the same way. My Daughter was 9 at the time of the divorce where my ex-wife cheated on me and ended up marrying my daughters best friends uncle. My daughter is 21 today and I still don't have any type of relationship with her because she only respects her mother and now step-father over the only person who was faithful. Also I had the only lawyer in the divorce and still gave my ex-wife everything because I knew she was getting custody and wanted to make sure my daughter was taken care of (This was before I knew she back stab me).

felix the cat
 •  14 hours ago

I worked from 11pm to 730am get off then be at my 9am to 1pm job for 10 years, and she still got half of my retirement, and alimony and we never had kids together!!

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El Lobo
 •  14 hours ago  •  14 hours ago

I learned early on from watching others go through it. My wife cheated... not once but twice... and left for the excitement of something new. All the while she made me out to be to blame, despite a track record that I found out later about that showed she had this pattern.

I was unemployed at the time but I fought tooth and nail for my son, getting a shared custody agreement. Child support, I told her, was something I would not go after her for if she did not go after me as circumstances and wages changed over time. I have been a faithful father to my son and, in time, he decided he wanted to live with me full time because he caught on to the BS his mother pulled.

Talk the talk, walk the walk, and be an effective, positive parent to your kids. It's not about working a 6 figure job and only having time to run them to soccer. Don't shelter them and don't spoil them as if to somehow make it easier on them. Show them how to face adversity and come through it a better human being. In front of them, live the life in your personal life as you want them to live when they grow.

A Yahoo reader
 •  13 hours ago  •  13 hours ago

Join father rights groups. Demand equal custody of your children. Don't allow the so called family law courts to remove fathers from childrens lives. Everyone is agreeing joint custody is better for the children EXCEPT for the lawyers who gain from discord. Lawyers and Bar Associations introduce laws into states to make joint custody lopsided in order to cause conflict, which causes couples to hire them to right the wrong. Lawyers and Bar Associations should remain out of divorces. Leave it to an arbitration board.

david
 •  14 hours ago  •  14 hours ago

I too, am a divorced dad. I was divorced when my daughters were 7 and 4. They're now 34 and 31. I see a common thread here where most of the men are posting about how it was the ex's fault. It matters not, especially to the kids. I was fully aware, because of my prison officer career, how many "fathers" were neglectful of their financial responsibilities towards their children and used the ex wife as their excuse. I was also aware of the prevalence of exwives who were never satisfied with exhusbands who DID fulfill their obligations, and always wanted more. Many of the guys I worked with lived in near poverty because of the amount of income taken by the ex's, and often court ordered. I was determined not to let that happen, so I made sure to pay my child support obligation first, before any other bill. I always bought my girls extra stuff too. School clothes, field trips, parties, my medical insurance was their primary, and to her credit, my ex never asked for an increase in the support. I paid religiously for 17 years. My girls stayed at my home on every day off I had, until they were teens and no longer interested in being with dad due to their social lives. I recently spent a day with my younger daughter and her kids, and she told me, "Mom said she was sorry she didn't work on her marriage to you." I knew she had abandoned our marriage, but I never said so to my girls, so it was nice to know that my ex acknowledged it. Of course she's happily remarried and the kids see her all the time, whereas I'm still single, live alone, and see them rarely. But, my babies are happy and healthy, and it really was a matter of, "as long as the kids are okay..."

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